Two days ago, i was eating out for lunch at a nearby hawker stall, which is my favourite for now at my taman. i was commenting to my bf about how cheap the mixed rice was, compared to the price that was charged to me 20% higher at my working place. the food was js shortly displayed, and full of varieties, i dont think it would that much variety if i came 1.5 hrs later (a lot of hungry working people here during lunchtime). we had an early 11am lunch (or perhaps brunch). we wanted to go somewhere, i remembered, but to where, i forgotten.
A young couple was behind of me, eating with their 2 kids (1 kor kor aged roughly 3-4yrs old, the other is still a baby boy). out of sudden, the big brother cried out loudly, grumbling in between his cries, demanding for rice. immediately, like a normal 3-8 person would do, i looked at the table, searching for his food his mum was feeding him. yeh, it was not rice, some noodles soup instead. what happened was he wanted to eat his younger brother's food, for his mum was feeding his younger brother with some porridge or sth similar to which babies can swallow.
Kids nowadays are more demanding. i've seen more cases like this. they want what they want, and unless they get it, they won't stop showing "kerenah"s. i dont remember myself showing so much kerenahs in front of my parents when i was at that age. i should say, my mum, who happen to be a nurse, disciplined us four well. but now, she let us have our say on how we want to lead our lives. look, mum, we all become independent now.
So, to all adults, these pointers may be helpful in ensuring your kids behave, based on my observations over the years:
1. Give them what they want only when they do what you told them to do, ie. behave well in public/ at home.
2. Tell them that if they don't behave, they will be grounded from doing what they like (eg. watching tv for 2 hrs, no toys session or no playground session in the evenings). implement what you have said, or they wont take you seriously next time.
3. Make up stories about some friend's kids who don't behave well, and ended up losing friends. This slightly-threatening tactic seems to work to one of the kid that i myself could not control his hyperactive cum slight bully behaviour, and boy, he was darn scared of not having friends each time he hears his adult reminding him the same story, over and over. i wonder till when this works, before he knows this is just a made-up story.
4. If we punish them when they are ill-behaved, we should also reward them when they are well-behaved. The degree of rewarding is also crucial. Please reward sparingly, or else, you may end up being informally financially broke by your kids' demands. For eg. a reward upgrade from a wall's ice cream to haagen-daaz ice-cream within a week. At that stage, please dont come and blame me for my pointers. i dont have extra haagen daaz ice-cream to spare your kids!
5. Lastly, always remind them that your intention is never bad. it's a parent's obligation to discipline their kids into a better person as they grow up. And comparing themselves with another kid from the same school which your kids thinks he is luckier, only makes them happy now, but spoilt and overreliant later. At that point of time, tell them another story!
Rgds,
Once-a-kid-too
Few Sunday's ago, I happen to be wondering around in an art gallery which have arts (doink, what else can an art gallery sell?!) for sale.
